Comments on: When old memories come rushing back http://www.thedateabledork.com/2009/03/when-old-memories-come-rushing-back/ Dating (mis)adventures of an unexpectedly sexy New Yorker Wed, 08 Sep 2010 10:52:03 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.1 By: The Dateable Dork http://www.thedateabledork.com/2009/03/when-old-memories-come-rushing-back/comment-page-1/#comment-1180 The Dateable Dork Thu, 02 Apr 2009 00:37:52 +0000 http://www.thedateabledork.com/?p=549#comment-1180 I was almost in tears reading your responses, BTW. Such a sensitive topic! Nadine - I find it hopelessly impossible to do. When you're with someone for that long and have that amazingly close connection, I think it's impossible to ever completely let it go. As for me, I don't *want* to ever completely let it go - it means too much, you know? Chris - I couldn't have said it better myself. That's a perfectly healthy attitude to take. I think I'm there most days, but some days (like yesterday) I let things get to me. Doesn't looking through that old shoe box make all those feelings come rushing back? I have a similar box of stuff from the five-year BF, but I'm too scared to open it... I'm sure I'd be crying for hours. How do you handle it? Offdwall - That's such a rough/strange situation. I met the five-year BF for lunch a few months after we broke up, and he looked so different... it was as if my old BF had completely disappeared. I think it was too early to meet him since we were both still hurting. It was just so strange to see him like that. I was almost in tears reading your responses, BTW. Such a sensitive topic!

Nadine – I find it hopelessly impossible to do. When you’re with someone for that long and have that amazingly close connection, I think it’s impossible to ever completely let it go. As for me, I don’t *want* to ever completely let it go – it means too much, you know?

Chris – I couldn’t have said it better myself. That’s a perfectly healthy attitude to take. I think I’m there most days, but some days (like yesterday) I let things get to me. Doesn’t looking through that old shoe box make all those feelings come rushing back? I have a similar box of stuff from the five-year BF, but I’m too scared to open it… I’m sure I’d be crying for hours. How do you handle it?

Offdwall – That’s such a rough/strange situation. I met the five-year BF for lunch a few months after we broke up, and he looked so different… it was as if my old BF had completely disappeared. I think it was too early to meet him since we were both still hurting. It was just so strange to see him like that.

]]> By: Offdwall http://www.thedateabledork.com/2009/03/when-old-memories-come-rushing-back/comment-page-1/#comment-1179 Offdwall Wed, 01 Apr 2009 14:48:11 +0000 http://www.thedateabledork.com/?p=549#comment-1179 I have been in this exact situation, except that I actually followed through all the leads Google provided and contacted THE old girlfriend. I found out she was married, two kids, and going through an ugly divorce. I saw just before the divorce finalized and was completely underwhelmed atthe person she'd become. Looking back, I wish I hadn't seen her so that I could have kept my old memories of her intact. <abbr><em>Offdwall’s last blog post..<a href="http://writingsoffthewall.wordpress.com/2009/04/01/three-the-hard-way/" rel="nofollow">Three The Hard Way</a></abbr></em> I have been in this exact situation, except that I actually followed through all the leads Google provided and contacted THE old girlfriend. I found out she was married, two kids, and going through an ugly divorce.

I saw just before the divorce finalized and was completely underwhelmed atthe person she’d become. Looking back, I wish I hadn’t seen her so that I could have kept my old memories of her intact.

Offdwall’s last blog post..Three The Hard Way

]]> By: Chris http://www.thedateabledork.com/2009/03/when-old-memories-come-rushing-back/comment-page-1/#comment-1178 Chris Wed, 01 Apr 2009 13:53:51 +0000 http://www.thedateabledork.com/?p=549#comment-1178 DD, I have an ex-GF like that as well. I keep all her stuff packed in a shoe box that I look at like once a year. But I make no attempts to contact her, she's married and moved on, but the relationship we had still holds a small part of my heart, so I acknowledge that and don't dwell on it. I've realized I won't forget and that its OK for me not to, as long as I live the life I have now. DD, I have an ex-GF like that as well. I keep all her stuff packed in a shoe box that I look at like once a year. But I make no attempts to contact her, she’s married and moved on, but the relationship we had still holds a small part of my heart, so I acknowledge that and don’t dwell on it. I’ve realized I won’t forget and that its OK for me not to, as long as I live the life I have now.

]]> By: Nadine http://www.thedateabledork.com/2009/03/when-old-memories-come-rushing-back/comment-page-1/#comment-1177 Nadine Wed, 01 Apr 2009 05:55:39 +0000 http://www.thedateabledork.com/?p=549#comment-1177 That does sound scary as hell. I'm trying to get over my boyfriend of four years (hell, I am only 20 ...) and I already find it very hard to do. That does sound scary as hell. I’m trying to get over my boyfriend of four years (hell, I am only 20 …) and I already find it very hard to do.

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